First off, how has your 2021 been?

Honestly? Both incredible and really tough. So many amazing things have happened this year, we fell pregnant with our baby girl due to be born in Jan, we opened our first flagship store in Cardiff city centre, launched in all stores at Urban Outfitters and went from 0 to nearly 200K followers on TikTok in under 6 months which has been insane. But also with rapid growth comes so much pressure, especially when you’ve never run a business or do any marketing/finance/logistics so you are learning on the job and have to learn fast. We also have 15 employees now, when this time last year it was only me and Ronnie (my finance). Running a business is a roller coaster, the pressure is intense!

Can you tell us your background before starting Mallows?

I have always been fashion and clothes obsessed, so did a Fashion Design degree at Bath and then after graduating I went to work for Dune as an accessories buyer in London, I absolutely loved buying and designing accessories, however buying for a customer with a totally different taste to you is hard, I loved working on the bright fun pieces, and introduced as much pink as I could get away with, I love that my whole range is pink and fun now! I actually got into skincare as when living in London developed severe acne, and just become obsessed with buying, testing and trying products to try and cure my acne myself, as everything prescribed to me didn’t work, my skin is very sensitive so I ended up with raw burnt skin a lot, which I was so fed up with. I would stay up all night researching ingredients and products, and seeing how they worked on my skin. I ended up finding out over the counter ingredients that worked for me and wanted to put them all into one face mask/product and that’s really how Mallows Beauty was born.

What inspired you to go it alone and start your own brand?

I wondered how many other people like me had made themselves feel so inadequate due to this, I literally felt like I was dirty, that I couldn’t go out because of my spots or skin texture, when actually I was totally normal. It really affected my mental health and made my anxiety so bad, I would panic before going into meetings thinking everyone would be talking about my face as soon as I left. So I thought there needed to be a brand that was 100% real, real skin, real bodies and real people – with products with actual real results, not just trying to sell something that wasn’t possible.

So many brands say they can shrink pores, when scientifically that just isn’t possible. So Mallows Beauty was born, it is important for me to have positive wording on the packaging that’s going to sit on your shelves, to remind you throughout your day that you are amazing, we also use lots of body-positive imagery on packaging to again remind everyone that you are normal and beautiful! We donate 5% of profits to mental health charities, and 100% never ever edit any photos, I love it when models flaunt their spots, cellulite etc as that’s what we are all about.

How do you describe Mallows Beauty to new customers and what is your mission statement?

We are the ultimate destination for self-love and we aim to make you glow, inside and out. We are all about the real; real skin, real bodies, real people, and products with real results. All my products are vegan, made in the UK and we donate 5% of profits to mental health charities. Self-love, inclusivity, body and skin positivity is woven into everything we do as a brand, it’s not just a campaign we are running to tick a box, it is everything we are about, our foundations and our goal as a brand, to encourage everyone to love themselves for who they are.

What’s the process like for creating a new product?

What do you use the most from all your products, any holy grails?

Toughie, as before becoming pregnant I would use my pineapple enzyme peel mask religiously, it was the only thing that kept my breakouts under control and helped my scarring, but I can’t use it now I’m pregnant (and why I started to develop a pregnancy range for mama’s to be)! Now I am obsessed with my body butters, watermelon is my fave (I am watermelon obsessed) and my watermelon body scrub, I haven’t got one stretch mark and I am putting it down to using these two! 😊

What have some of the challenges been whilst creating products and running your own business?

If I am honest, cash. I run Mallows Beauty alongside my fiancé and business partner Ronnie, we have funded Mallows beauty 100% ourselves through lots of different loans and reinvesting everything back into the business, we actually haven’t paid ourselves for the past 18 months! So we have to be very careful about which products to launch as the risk is on us and we have a limited pot of cash to use. I feel like that is the only thing that holds us back, otherwise, we could have a huge range and use loads of influencers to promote. But we have to be very selective and very careful about where we spend our money – small business issues! Both of us aren’t from a finance background either, so managing cash flow has been one of the toughest things, especially as the company has grown so rapidly.

How much of your growth do you owe to social media marketing, especially TikTok? (which is brilliant by the way!)

Aw thank you! A huge amount!! It is really what has made us so successful, especially TikTok, we get most of our sales from TikTok. It’s incredible as you can post one video, it goes viral and then you get 100’s of orders. You just reach a new audience all the time, which you don’t get with Instagram or other social media channels really. However, my IG following is really dedicated, loyal and supportive. I honestly feel so lucky to have such amazing followers, business can be so tough, and I have had some really hard weeks and my lovely followers have kept me going, boosted me when I’ve needed it most!

What’s next for Mallows Beauty?!

So much! We are launching with a super exciting retailer this month, which I am planning on spilling the beans on during my takeover. We have so many new ranges in the works like my pregnancy range, cleansers, face moisturisers, hair masks – so the full 360 beauty experience! We are also planning on launching 5 more stores next year around the UK, so watch this space!! 😊

What does your perfect weekend look like?

To be honest, it might sound boring but a really chilled one as my life is so full-on and hectic, and I work too much. So me and Ronnie love to have a ‘lock-in’ in where I switch off my phone, movies snuggled up on the sofa, and lots of food…I LOVE food. So pizza, baked cookie doughs and a roast dinner on Sunday. And then have long walks on the beach with Artie, especially in winter with a big coat on. YUM.

What do you always carry with you?

Not sure if this counts but Artie, who is a cavapoo but thinks he is human. He literally comes with me everywhere I go, even to external meetings – the best perk of working for yourself!

What would your last ever meal be?

Large Dominos pizza (all for me, no sharing) – half margarita, half chicken with veggies, stuffed crust of course. Aaand my mum’s home-baked scones for dessert, probably followed by some carrot cake (my pregnancy obsession).

What is one positive piece of advice you could give to our audience?

Know your worth and don’t tear yourself down. We are all programmed to criticize ourselves to push ourselves forward, but complimenting yourself and focusing on your strengths will have the same impact. I spent too long in my life hating myself, and it got me nowhere.

Laura Mallows

Start by giving yourself a cheeky compliment everyday and build it up, focus on what makes you, you. There is only one of you and you are incredible. You need to be your own cheerleader, not your worst enemy. Believe and love yourself, you’re wasting your life if you are spending it hating yourself.

Whilst it might technically still be October for another few hours, once the clock strikes midnight and November 1st is upon us, Mariah Carey will begin to slowly defrost, fairy lights across the globe will be turning on and staying on, and the countdown to the 25th December officially begins! AHHH. Whether you’re renting, living in student accommodation or simply want an easy and fuss-free way to get into the Christmas spirit with minimal effort, festive bedding is one of the easiest ways to add some magical, Christmassy fun to your home, all without breaking the bank. 

From Dunelm to Very, John Lewis to Made, there are endless online and IRL stores stocking the creme de la creme of Christmas decor for the bedroom, making the most challenging part of the festive months deciding which set to put on first …

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Chin chin b*tches, pints of Pimm’s and endless Aperol Spritz might be behind us this season, but there’s something about autumnal evenings in a candlelit bar or fireside in your local pub that oozes sophisticated, romantic vibes. As the evenings draw darker and the clocks fall back, the time for red lips, 30 denier tights, bundled up scarfs and flirty ankle boots is here, and is anyone else completely overjoyed about it?!

Whether you plan to sip a glass of red with the girls or a warming mocktail with a date (or two), nailing a seasonally appropriate look that is both weather appropriate and dressy enough to show 2020’s lockdown who’s boss is a simple pleasure of the cooler months that needs shouting about. If the draw of a cosy, intimate evening with your nearest and dearest at the coolest spot in town isn’t enough, the magic of your sophisticated autumn outfit will be.

Lareese

Probs a bit OTT for evening drinks but we move! I’m doubling up on the croc with boots and an oversized blazer over this puff sleeve floral dress. Whack on a red lip and I’ll be ready to sip a few sparkling wines (read: slam a few tequilas).

Zara, FLORAL PRINT DRESS, £29.99 | *Boohoo, Block Heel Croc Knee High Boot, £45 | *Weekday, Rumi Croco Blazer, £70 | Zara, SHINY SHOULDER BAG, £49.99

Danielle

Loving a bit of khaki and black for this upcoming season, and even though I’m yet to purchase a pair of knee-high heeled boots, I keep dreaming up outfits featuring this Dune pair. The silky satin midi skirt trend is yet to go anywhere so people probably have one of these in their wardrobe from last season, thrown on with some simple knitwear, chic black handbag and THE boots. Topped off with chunky gold jewellery, Zara has some really different bits in at the moment I’m loving!

*Mango, Midi satin skirt, £49.99 | *H&M, Knitted jumper, £17.99 | *H&M, Gathered shoulder bag, £24.99 | *Dune, SPICE – Black Pointed Knee High Boots, £195 | Zara, PACK OF LINK BRACELETS, £14.99 | Zara, SQUARE DANGLE EARRINGS, £14.99

Holly

Does anyone else struggle with dressing nice but warm in winter? Because I HATE being cold but I also hate tights so we’re in a bit of a predicament. I have a black jumpsuit similar to this one which I think will make a few appearances these crisp nights and can wear different accessories every time to switch it up but honestly I’m lost. I’ve wanted this Kurt Geiger bag for years so maybe this is the year I treat myself.

*Silk Fred, Kimono Knot Top Culotte Jumpsuit, £45 | PrettyLittleThing, BLACK STRAPPY GLADIATOR POINT TOE HEEL, £30 | *Anthropologie, Set of 3 Aimee Claw Hair Clips, £22

Darcey

I love an evening drinks look, getting dressed up just always makes me feel good and it’s fun to let your hair down! I’ve gone for a leather blazer look, with some black straight jeans and an off the shoulder top. Paired with some green accessories to give it a little edge (anyone else obsessed with green at the moment?) and some gold hoop earrings!

*Marks and Spencer, Roma Straight Leg Jeans, £35 | *Marks and Spencer, Faux Leather Blazer, £59 | *ASOS, NA-KD cut out detail one shoulder top in black, £16 | *ASOS, Healing mid heeled mules in green, £55 | Azurina, ‘Amalfi’ Green Chain Strap Cross Body Bag, £120 | *Missoma, Medium Braid Hoop Earrings, £110

Charlotte

I. Love. Evening. Drinks! Any excuse to get dressed up is 100% something I’m down for (the novelty still hasn’t worn off after lockdown) and a sexy red lip and glass of wine is my idea of heaven. I’ve gone for a chic, black number from Warehouse which gives me mega Alexa Chung vibes so of course I love it. I recently got a pair of second hand knee high boots and now want to replace my entire shoe collection with other variations of them and this pair from Nasty Gal are AMAZING. Will be buying ASAP.

*Warehouse, Flute Sleeve Diamond Trim Shirt Dress, £69 | *Nasty Gal, Faux Leather Contrast Knee High Heeled Boots, £59 | *Glossier, Generation G sheer matte lipstick, £14*Selfridges, ROOP Upcycled Furoshiki satin bag, £75

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First off, how has your 2021 been so far?

It’s been an interesting year, but all good so far. I have been working on so many small magic projects this year, all of which will be leading to some much bigger things in 2022. Some really exciting things to come!

Can you tell us about your interest in Tarot Card reading and how you decided to get into the practice?

What is the process like for reading someone’s cards?

It is magic! There is an energy exchange, you, as the reader, are acting as the channel for the messages. You can tune into their energy by asking the cards to read for them. Or some tarot readers allow people to touch the cards themselves. You will agree on what type of reading you will be performing, so what questions or areas you will cover and how many cards will be pulled etc. Once the cards are pulled and laid out, you go through each card explaining the meaning and intuitively what messages there may be coming through for them. It is such an honour to be able to have this gift and do readings for people. I get such a buzz from it.

Do you share both positive and negative information regarding someone’s cards?

For me, the idea of working with the cards is not about seeing negative, or strictly only positive meaning, but it’s about tapping into your intuition, it’s often bringing to the surface what you already might ‘have a feeling’ about, that gut feeling, so it’s more about clarity. Or just that little needed nudge in the right direction, and how you might navigate things. 

How often do you read your own cards?

What do you hope are the main takeaways for someone after having their cards read?

To come to a reading open-minded and leave with clarity, direction, and some positive actions to take forward. I always go back over the reading and summarise what’s come up, how the cards are connected and what might be the key standout takeaway or message. I follow up my readings with a written explanation and image of the cards. Some clients find that readings make more sense a few hours, days or even weeks later.  So, they have this to refer to whenever they would like.

What are some common misconceptions people have around Tarot Card reading?

There are actually quite a few myths around the practice of tarot. Firstly, that tarot is about predicting the future. This is not how I practice, I believe we do not have a set future, decisions we make each day will alter and shape the path we’re on, so the cards cannot then tell us what will happen to us.  Other myths include you’re not meant to buy your own tarot decks. I mean this is a very ancient tradition, and you CAN absolutely buy your own cards, and there are so many beautiful decks out there! Also, that you need to be a witch or psychic to read cards. This is also not true; anyone can read cards. It is learning about intuition, opening your mind, and having fun with it.

What’s next for you in terms of tarot, are there other levels to get to or other decks to explore?

For me it’s always about going deeper into intuition, working, and connecting with my gifts. I do this through tarot and my other witch practices. I also love to work with a couple of decks at a time. I find they have their own personalities and then have their own way of presenting readings. I love to experiment with the decks and their ‘attitudes’.

What’s the best experience you remember giving someone after reading their cards?

Some of my favourite readings are people’s first ones. People can be nervous about their first reading but when they feel into it and see how positive and illuminating it can be, it’s so wonderful to see how they open up over the reading.  I have had some people have quite strong realisations in readings, and to be part of that process is amazing.

What does your perfect weekend look like?

My perfect weekend would include a long walk in nature or along the coast, blasting away the cobwebs. I love this time of year for that. Having time to make up some products with essential oils and herbs, I can get totally lost in making products. Also, spell work, this is a real passion for me. Meditation, reading, popping out for coffee, and seeing friends and family is all the lovely things I like to enjoy at the weekend. This all keeps me grounded, and when you’re working with intuition this is really important.

What do you always carry with you?

I always have a crystal with me. It might be in my bag, in my pocket or my purse. I work with crystals in many ways and when I am working with one in particular than I like to have it close for its energy.

What would your last ever meal be?

Oh wow, that’s hard. But if it had to be one meal, I think it would be a roast dinner, followed by apple crumble and ice cream. Has to be ice cream, not custard.

What is one positive piece of advice you could give to our audience?

Trust your gut feelings. Your instinct, your intuition, will not lie.

Follow Sim on Instagram here and check out our We Tried: Tarot Card Reading article with Sim here!

Whilst the ye olde classic chocolate advent calendar certainly has its benefits (a sweet treat before 8am? Don’t mind if we do), there’s nothing quite like the thrill of a more substantial, shall we say, advent calendar to make every morning in December feel like Christmas Day itself. And we know what you’re thinking, Halloween has yet to come and go, but if you wish to be on the ‘it’ list of exclusive beauty advent calendar owners in 2021, it’s time to get with the programme because these bad boys sell out FAST.

From Liberty to Jo Malone, Charlotte Tilbury to Birchbox, beauty brands far and wide have jumped on the advent calendar hype and granted every make-up and skincare lovers wish for a delightful treat during the most glitzy month of the year. Whether your S/O or bestie has earned some serious brownie points, or instead it’s more of a ‘to me, from me’ situation, securing the goods early to avoid disappointment is essential in this magnificent realm of minis and magic. Keep scrolling to decide on your fave, and get adding to basket, stat!

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Between You and Me Part 21 coming in hot! This month sees us chatting commitment issues and the seven-year itch (read: 3-4 years in this case), dream jobs that just so happen to feel a lot like hell, dipping your toes back into dating post-pandemic, boyfriend separation anxiety and keeping sex exciting whilst dealing with sexual trauma and vaginismus.

If you’ve got a lot on your plate at the moment and need to get it off your chest, drop us an email at betweenyouandme@zoella.co.uk – because sometimes it’s just easier to share it with strangers on the internet than with those closest to you.

Charlotte

Hello lovely! As both an SA victim and someone who experiences Vulvodynia on a daily basis I read this and just felt SO MUCH empathy and love for you. Firstly, you are so strong. I really hope you’re able to acknowledge that. And secondly, you’re doing a fabulous, fabulous job- I promise. Okay, let’s get down to the nitty gritty!

It can be really hard to find things that feel good whilst also being safe for you when you’ve got these health and trauma issues to consider, but don’t fear because there truly is so much you can explore on this journey to feeling empowered and positive in the bedroom both alone and with a partner. First off, have you experimented with toys at all? They’re not only great to help you feel 10/10 on your own (which can sometimes be a good first step if you’re anxious with a partner touching you) but are also a fun way for you and your boyfriend to explore pleasure together in a new way. Brands like Smile Makers, Biird and Love Honey are amazing and have so much to offer that doesn’t require penetration as I know that can be tricky when it comes to Vaginismus sometimes.

Masturbating together with your boyfriend could also be incredible and empower you to take back a bit of control in touching yourself and reconnecting with your body whilst also both having a good time. Maybe watch some Normal People or Bridgerton (or check out our ethical porn post for GR8 website recommendations!) and get touchy in bed together- it could even be good foreplay before easing into sex if you’re feeling able on that day! Here’s a few other things you could try to spice things up that would hopefully feel safe for you:

• A sensual/sexy bath or shower together. I’m thinking oils, massages and bubbles.
• Explore other parts of each other’s body that feel safer, for example your boobs, neck kissing or even massaging your back can be v v sexyyyy.
• Have some fun with food e.g. chocolate icing or ice cream (temperature play too!) and tongues- a winner for all involved.
• Butt stuff. Side eye emoji. Don’t knock it till you’ve tried it!

I hope this helps lovely and remember you are whole exactly as you are.

Darcey

Hi anon!

Thank you so much for writing in, I think this is a great question that I know many people struggle with. Also, you are so bloody strong, and I hope you know that!

I struggle with psychosomatic issues with sex, just due to not feeling like I’ve had the most enjoyable experiences and body image has always played a part too, so I can understand from a vaginismus point of view as I can experience pain during sex which can make penetration not possible / difficult. I think finding what you like on your own first could be super empowering for you, are you experienced at all in using toys? I think clitoral stimulant only toys are good for people who don’t enjoy / can’t do penetration. Smile Makers have a really great range which really focus on clitoral pleasure, I think knowing our own bodies is so essential to having great sex with partners. If you are an experienced toy user and are thinking “I know all this already” ha, then I reckon explore different areas of your body that feel comfortable but pleasurable. We have so many different spots on the body which can give us pleasure; neck, ears, feet, hands, inner thighs, the list goes on! Maybe explore this yourself and then get your boyfriend involved when you have figured out what feels good and safe and what doesn’t?

Different forms of sexual stimulants (lol) like audio porn are good to try too! Quinn is a good app and it’s proven that most women prefer audio porn to video porn as we like to use our imagination more. You could even listen together and maybe see what it provokes? Masturbating together is a great way to enjoy sex together while feeling comfortable as well especially with your past sexual trauma, feeling comfortable and safe is most important over anyone else’s sexual pleasure. I think just experiment, experiment, experiment (with things you are comfortable doing of course!). Sex is so different for so many people and I think that’s the beauty in it as it can be so personal between you and your partner, finding what works best for you both as a pair. I hope this sparks some inspo for you! All the best, Darcey Xx

Danielle

Heya! I’m so sorry to hear you’re going through this inner turmoil, not knowing whether or not you are ready for taking that commitment to the next level can be torture. What’s the rush with getting married? I understand if your partner is extremely set on it, but have you thought that could be the blocker you’re trying to avoid? Maybe getting married and committing yourself to just one person doesn’t really jive with you and that’s ok. I think far too much pressure is put on us to have one relationship for the rest of our lives but maybe you’re more suited to short-term partners? Or perhaps you might consider being on your own for a bit, finding your own happiness and then you can find whomever you like attractive! It must be frustrating to feel like you’re stuck in a rut but perhaps it’s becoming a bit of a self-fulfilling prophecy that you think it’s going to happen so it does. How would you feel if your partner broke up with you tomorrow? Would you be ok seeing them go, or heartbroken? It sounds like you’re getting bored, maybe you need to be a bit more open and honest with your current partner and work at the relationship, it seems like that’s the person that stands to get hurt the most through all of this, and having a string of broken-hearted partners behind you, it might be worth getting some therapy and have them help you re-frame a few things in your relationships.

Lareese

Hello lovely,

If the issue is simply finding other people attractive, I don’t think it’s that deep. You’re always going to appreciate a good-looking person, regardless of whether you’re single or in a relationship that’s just the fundamentals of being a social creature. However, if it becomes more than a fleeting thought and you’re thinking about acting on those feelings and being unfaithful, then that’s probably a bit of a red flag. I guess you really need to take a deep dive into these doubts and figure out where they’re coming from, particularly as you’ve had this 3 – 4 year itch before. Perhaps it’s marriage thing that’s throwing you off and you’re not ready to take that step, or maybe monogamy just isn’t for you and after a few back-to-back serious relationships, you need to have some single fun for a while to explore other things. That said, like friendships, every relationship takes work, you have to be intentional about keeping things fresh and exciting and not just assume it will tend to itself. It’s also very possible that you haven’t met your person yet! Only you can get to the bottom of why you’re stuck in this rut but better to be honest with yourself and your partner because all the while you’re feeling like this, you’ve emotionally checked out of your relationship anyway. Best of luck with whatever you decide my love! Life’s too short to be stuck in something that doesn’t set your soul on fire, whether it’s a job, a relationship or a situationship xx

Maddie

Hey, thanks for your message and opening up about how you’re feeling. It’s been such a tough couple of years hasn’t it. The multiple lockdowns and isolation periods that we’ve all been through have been such a mental struggle and I think it’s completely normal that you’re feeling like you might be ready for a relationship having gone through all of that without the support of a partner. In fact i think it’s highly possible that the pandemic has expedited your want for a relationship because it’s been such an isolating time. The positives are that the world does seem to be opening up again, all of the things you said you enjoyed before are possible now and i would encourage you to go back to doing the things you love if you feel safe to do so. 26 is still incredibly young and you have so much life ahead of you to find the perfect partner. Although i know it’s easier said than done, try to not think of it as “searching” for someone, the more you get out there and enjoy life the more chances you will have to meeting someone new and sparking new relationships. You will not be alone forever, situations and circumstances change in a matter of days and there will be millions of other people feeling the exact way you’re feeling now, ready to meet someone new. I hope you find what you’re looking for, lots of love, M.

Darcey

Hi anon! Thank you for writing in and I can really empathise with you as someone who is also single and liking the idea of dating, but worried about Covid and living with vulnerable people, it’s a real tricky area isn’t it! Also very much agree that socialising can be exhausting, and it feels like people are just out and about 24/7 now. Also ditto on dating apps (are we the same person? Lol) I don’t particularly like them either, especially Tinder, why do we even bother on there because I truly don’t think I’ll be finding a future partner on that app!

I totally get the wanting to have a partner, especially after these last few years when times have been super isolating. I think though if you are feeling anxious about covid still maybe taking some time to focus on you would be good? You said before covid you were happily single and enjoying doing stuff on your own, I wonder if maybe trying to get back to that place again first (with covid in the mix now) would be beneficial. Maybe not gigs or large events, but museums etc! Finding yourself again after these crazy two years might be a good steppingstone, especially if you’d rather meet someone a bit more organically. What I do know is, you won’t be alone forever! You’ll find someone, I think a lot of single people feel like covid has delayed them meeting someone, but it will happen.

One dating app I can (just about) bear is Hinge, I find it is way nicer than Tinder which feels a bit like a looks contest, Hinge has prompts with talking points and I’d say a large majority of people on there are looking for relationships and not just hook-ups. You can also say if you are vaccinated or not so maybe dating people you know are fully vaccinated might make you more comfortable? Covid is an ever-changing situation and I totally appreciate how dating can feel scary when living with vulnerable people, I think just consider that if dating and meeting new people is making you anxious, maybe now isn’t the right time. That’s not to say though that in a few months that could all change, but I know for me I’ve concluded dating just isn’t for me now. You’ll find that happiness one day, I’m sure of it. All the best, Darcey Xx

Danielle

Hello love, it sounds like you’re having a really rough time with it but I want you to know you’ll get through this, and even though work is such a big part of our lives, as soon as you move on from this job it’ll be a distant memory. I’ve had my fair share of toxic work environments and yours sounds extremely familiar, it’s such an old school terrible way of doing business where people at the bottom need to earn their stripes doing grunt work before anyone takes them seriously. Now I’ll admit an entry-level marketing job might be more admin based than you’d hoped, but you should still feel like you can make a change and submit ideas without being mocked or made to feel like you shouldn’t. Personally, I would get a new job ASAP. Search high and low for another marketing role and get out as soon as you can, I know you probably feel like your confidence has had a huge knock, but you got this job and you can get another. Don’t rush into thinking every company will be like yours, you just need to find the right one for you, sometimes things don’t work out and your family will understand that. You want to get to a point where you’re happy enough in your day job you can start your passion project again, and I really think you’ll get there! On a slightly different note, you might want to consider working in content and social media, it’s a little more hands-on, you’d be able to hone your photography and video skills whilst doing your day job and you’ll also be getting the marketing side of things as you build strategies for platforms and ads, just a path worth exploring if you’re seeking a new opportunity!

Lareese

Hello lovely,

Well doesn’t this sound like quite the little toxic work environment. I’m sorry to hear you’re having a time of it, that sounds horrendous. No wonder you’re feeling stressed and exhausted. No one wants to be in a job where they feel like they’re constantly walking on eggshells and every idea you put forward is shot down for no apparent reason.

If you’re feeling like this after two months, I think that’s a pretty good indication that this isn’t the role for you. If I were you, I would sit tight for a few months if you can purely to bide your time and work on this side hustle photography business whilst you’re still financially sound. Get that ball rolling whilst you’re still in this role so that you can chuck your notice in and get the hell out of there. As for your family – they will quickly get over any expectations they had of this dream job for you, especially if they know it’s impacting your mental and physical health. No job is worth that! Let’s be frank, it’s turned out to be the opposite of a dream job and they wouldn’t want to see you sticking it out purely because they were excited and had high hopes for your new venture. They will be proud of you for standing your ground, knowing your worth and being true to yourself. Get working on that business plan, pal. You’ve got this!

Maddie

Hello! Thanks so much for sharing how you’re feeling- I think it’s really great that you’ve been able the pinpoint and understand these feelings and actually used the word ‘attached’ because that’s a really helpful way to look at it and understand the bond you have with your boyfriend. If you haven’t already heard of attachment styles then it might be something to have a Google about, but essentially it’s the different ways we relate and connect with other people and is particularly relevant when it comes to romantic relationships. Past experiences, relationships and particularly our childhood history can impact the type of attachment style we have, and can lead some people to have a more anxious or insecure attachment which means we rely on other people for the stability we can’t find within ourself and place a bigger emphasis on the role they play for us. It doesn’t have to be a bad thing and often makes us really big and bold with our love and the people we want to spend time with, but it might explain why you feel so connected and whole when you’re with your partner and so sad when he’s gone.

As Maddie also highlighted I do think it’s totally normal to miss your partner and crave time together when you love them, because that’s what being in love is all about, but if you can make some little changes and implement habits that encourage more inner stability and happiness I think it would make the world of difference for you. Make plans during the time you know you’ll be apart from your boyfriend so you’re not moping around, connect with old (or new!) friends, fill up your social calendar and spend some time reconnecting with how whole you are as an individual, without the need for anyone else too. It’s always lovely spending time with people you adore but being able to enjoy time alone is so valuable and will get you such a long way. I used to be exactly the same when I had a boyfriend and would want to experience everything together, but since being single I’ve realised the value I have as an individual and all that I can achieve and feel on my own too. Jo Westwood aka The Codependency Coach on Insta is GREAT for learning more about this and making some positive daily habits feel achievable. You got this girl, I promise!

Maddie

Hi lovely, thanks for your question and for taking the time to write to us. I think what you’re experiencing is perfectly normal. Missing someone you care about and feeling sad when they’re not around is a sign that you genuinely really love spending time with them. Time also tends to fly when you’re having fun, another sign that you’re enjoying your relationship which is positive. What it sounds like you need to work on is enjoying the things that don’t involve your boyfriend so that you don’t feel so lost without him being around. I think sometimes we can get so caught up in a relationship that you stop focusing on yourself and what makes you happy outside of that. Think about what made you happy before your relationship started. Was it spending time with your friends/family, a hobby, passion or interest etc. It’s very easy to forget some of those things when you fall in love as all your attention and free time focuses in on one person which can leave you to feel a bit empty when they’re not around. If I were you i would work on the other things outside of your relationship a bit more, the more time and energy you spend on yourself and not just your boyfriend the more content you will feel when you are apart. I hope you start to feel better soon!

Whilst there are many, many reasons to look forward to the hygge thirst trap that is: autumn, getting reacquainted with our telebox is right up there at numero uno. Ditching all open-air plans for the feel-good candlelit glow of Hogwarts and the treasured rom coms we’ve seen 184 times (what of it?) is exactly what this time of year was designed for. 

A feel-good watch list is an absolute necessity on those chilly fall evenings spent swaddled in your dressing gown but if you’re not quite ready for Hocus Pocus and hot water bottles just yet, these seasonal on-screen gems should get you in the mood. Featuring timeless cult classics, heart-warming animations and leafy scenes aplenty, pour yourself a hot toddy and nestle in for the foreseeable future with these cosy flicks. Bye, bye social life, hello hibernation station!  

1. Waitress (2007)

Give me the synopsis: 

We haven’t had a pie film this good since… well, American Pie but this is a pie strictly without the penis. The film follows Jenna Hunterson, a waitress and pie-baking genius who works in a diner in a small southern town. An unwanted pregnancy changes the events in her life and with the help of her friends, she finds the courage and confidence to start afresh. 

What’s so autumn about it: 

It’s a rom-com pie. If that doesn’t sell it to you, we can’t be pals. 

2. Practical Magic (1998)

Give me the synopsis:

Based on the Alice Hoffman book of the same name, Sandra Bullock and Nicole Kidman star in this pro-witch cult classic about a family of witches, navigating love, life & midnight margarita magic. 

What’s so autumn about it:  

Hard magic and feminism is always in season, plus Sally (Sandra Bullock) lights a candle with her breath. What more do you need? 

3. Autumn in New York (2000)

Give me the synopsis:  

An autumnal rom-com – clue’s in the name – starring Richard Gere and Winona Ryder. He plays a fancy-schmancy restaurateur (read: 48-year-old playboy), who falls for a terminally ill woman half his age. Insider’s tip, you will get something in your eye and only ice cream can fix it. 

What’s so autumn about it: 

Manhattan is the main character. 

4. Mona Lisa Smile (2003) 

Give me the synopsis: 

Julia Roberts stars as a free-thinking Art History teacher at the conservative Wellesley College in this period film set in 1950s New England. She sets out to empower her pupils and inspire them to challenge the outdated roles they’re expected to play in society. 

What’s so autumn about it: 

Great costumes, back-to-school vibes and New England in her best fall finery. 

5. Paddington (2014) 

Give me the synopsis: 

Crack open the jar of marmalade because this endearing film/s is the stuff of fluffy Seville Orange dreams. A warm-hearted live action comedy that follows the many misadventures of a young Wellington boot, red bucket-hat-wearing bear in the big city. 

What’s so autumn about it: 

Prime feel-good hibernation viewing. Watch it swiftly followed by the *elite* second movie.

6. Fantastic Mr Fox (2009)

Give me the synopsis:

This adaptation of Roald Dahl’s children’s book is a downright loveable watch for the whole family. Mr Fox (voiced by George Clooney) pledges to give up his wild chicken-thieving ways when he becomes a father but when he realises what’s available at the farms across the field, he can’t resist his animal instincts. Cue the game of cat and mouse or fox and farmer! Truly chef’s kiss entertainment for a rainy day in October. 

What’s so autumn about it: 

Wes Anderson got his paws on the colour palette. Need we say more? Pure animated JOY.

7. Sweet Home Alabama (2002) 

Give me the synopsis:

Successful New York fashion designer and bride-to-be Melanie Carmichael (Reese Witherspoon) returns home to Alabama to get her first hot husband to sign the divorce papers but upon seeing her ex, she starts to feel things for him all over again…

What’s so autumn about it: 

A childhood sweetheart story for cuffing season? Groundbreaking. 

8. Hocus Pocus (1993) 

Give me the synopsis:

It’s not October without the Sanderson sisters, that creepy Come Little Children soundtrack and Thackery White Shirt Hottie Binx. 

Max, a curious young boy who moves to Salem with his family, lights the black flame candle and brings three famous witches, Winnie, Sarah and Mary, back from the dead. Gulp. With the help of a magical cat (embodied with the soul of White Shirt Hottie) they must retrieve the witches’ spell book by sunrise to stop them from becoming immortal and reigning terror over Salem forever more. 

What’s so autumn about it? 

Halloween but make it cosy. 

9. You’ve Got Mail (1998) 

Give me the synopsis:

It’s not autumn until Tom Hanks says, “don’t cry shopgirl, don’t cry”. Independent bookstore owner Kathleen Kelly (Meg Ryan) starts up an *anonymous* internet romance with none other than her business rival, Joe Fox (Tom Hanks), owner of corporate superchain Fox Books. Eventually, Joe discovers Shopgirl’s true identity and must decide what to do about the blossoming romance between them. Will these online lovers, offline enemies be able to put aside their differences for l-o-v-e? 

What’s so autumn about it? 

Came here for the dial up nostalgia, stayed for the absolute autumn SCENES. It will make you want to roll in a pile of leaves. Thank you, Nora Ephron. Thank you. 

10. Dead Poets Society (1989) 

Give me the synopsis:

A new English teacher, John Keating, played by the king of feel-good Robin Williams, shakes up the private school lesson plans and inspires his pupils to realise their dreams with contemporary teachings of poetry in this coming-of-age gem. 

What’s so autumn about it? 

It eats Seasonal Affective Disorder for breakfast. 

11. Harry Potter and The Philosopher’s Stone (2001) 

Give me the synopsis:

This film needs no introduction. The first time we meet an eleven-year-old bespectacled boy wizard as he sets off for Hogwarts will always have a special place in our hearts. Pour yourself a pumpkin juice and bask in the joy of John Williams’ magical soundtrack. He is a wizard of the highest order. 

What’s so autumn about it? 

Halloween in the Great Hall, duh. 

12. Coco (2019)

Give me the synopsis: 

Despite his family’s generations-old ban on music, Miguel, a 12-year-old Mexican boy dreams of becoming an accomplished musician, just like his idol Ernesto de la Cruz. Desperate to prove his talent, Miguel finds himself transported to the Land of the Dead where he reconciles with his family’s past and learns all about his musical roots. 

What’s so autumn about it? 

The all-singing all-dancing skeletons. 

13. Good Will Hunting (1997) 

Give me the synopsis: 

This psychological drama follows Will Hunting (Matt Damon), a caretaker cleaning floors at a prestigious college in Boston and a secret mathematical genius. When he solves a difficult math problem, Professor Gerald Lambeau discovers his gift and offers to help the misguided youth reach his full potential, on the condition that he seeks help from therapist Sean Maguire (Robin Williams). The bromance will turn your bottom lip to jelly. 

What’s so autumn about it? 

Leaves (and tears) for days. Your move, chief.

14. Cruella (2021) 

Give me the synopsis: 

Emma Stone plays an aspiring designer first known as Estella in this live-action punk prequel about the dog-napping villain, Cruella de Vil. Penniless and orphaned, Estella and her sidekicks, Horace and Jasper, run wild around London where they come up against the owner of the iconic couture company House of Baroness, expertly portrayed by Emma Thompson. Cue the fashion face-off. 

What’s so autumn about it? 

Gorgeous atmospheric London scenes & all the Halloween /Fall fashion inspo. Put the garbage dress in the V&A museum at once. 

15. Enola Holmes (2020)

Give me the synopsis: 

Stranger Things actress Millie Bobby Brown stars as the title character in this female-led Netflix Original movie about the younger sister of famous detective, Sherlock Holmes. While searching for her missing mother, she outwits her brother and becomes entangled in another mystery with the young runaway Viscount Tewkesbury. A glorious romp through 19^thcentury England ensues.

What’s so autumn about it?

The captivating cinematography makes it the perfect movie to hunker down with when it’s blowing a gale outside. 

‘Tis the season for meandering through orange fields of joy (also known as the humble pumpkin patch) and embracing everything nature has to offer in the most magical season change of the year. Whether it be as part of a Blair Waldorf worthy pumpkin pie, to carve alongside a mulled cider, or simply to grab a pic for the ‘gram (no judgement here), dressing for your trip to the farm is peak autumn goals if we ever did see it.

Pantone called and they want their autumn colour swatches back, because if you’re not channelling the rust/sage/orange and chocolate shades whilst strutting the muddy trenches of your local PYO patch then you’re doing it wrong. Sorry, we don’t make the rules. Keep scrolling to see the outfits Team Zoella are going to be rocking this season whilst pushing a wheelbarrow of vegetable goodness. Alexa: play Sweater Weather by The Neighbourhood.

Charlotte

Pumpkin picking is an autumn rite of passage and I am SO here for it. Pumpkin carving, not so much, but a wholesome walk around a gorgeous field of orange deliciousness is a big fat yes from me. I’ve gone for quite a dressy ‘fit as I’m imagining it transferring into a brunch and let’s be real, autumnal drinks (aka any drink in the cooler months) which I feel like a blazer is always perfect for. I ADORE this scarf from Ganni and am prepared to eat beans on toast for the rest of the year to own it. Finish off with some chunky boots and it’s the perfect farming outfit!

*Mango, Houndstooth wool-blend blazer, £69.99 | Na-kd, Organic Wide Leg High Waisted Denim, £40.95 | Plumo, FLASH GREEN SCARF BY GANNI, £149 | *Stradivarius, High neck sweater, £15.99 | *Ego, CHUNKY CLEATED SOLE ANKLE BOOT, £69.99

Lareese

I made the mistake of wearing Converse to a pumpkin patch a few years back and they didn’t see Christmas so I won’t be doing that again. This year, I’m sticking to appropriate footwear with a pair of glorified wellington boots teamed with brown dungies, 70s florals and a cosy fleece to keep me warm when I’m out there fondling the gourds.

Pull & Bear, FADED LONG DENIM DUNGAREES, £29.99 | Pull & Bear, FLORAL PRINT TULLE T-SHIRT, £14.99 | Zara, RUBBERISED FLAT BOOTS, £59.99 | *ASOS, Daisy Street Plus boxy fit colour block fleece, £35

Darcey

I absolutely love going pumpkin picking! I usually stay clear of anything white or light coloured, especially in the UK when it’s likely to be rainy and muddy. This year I’ll probably wear some black jeans and turtleneck, paired with a big comfy gilet and some sturdy boots like Dr Martens. I usually go pretty light on the clothing cause stomping around the field lifting pumps ends up actually being a pretty good workout ha!

*H&M, Padded gilet, £34.99 | *Mango, High-waist cropped straight jeans, £35.99 | *ASOS, ultimate turtle neck in black, £12 | *ASOS, Dr Martens Sinclair boots in black, £189

Maddie

I cannot wait for pumpkin picking this year, one thing I’ve learnt and will make sure I don’t get wrong this year is wearing the right footwear is crucial. I always end up covered in mud and freezing when I visit a PYO pumpkin patch, probably because I always spend ages deciding on the perfect one. Layers and lots of warm accessories are my friends! I just bought these north face boots and I’m obsessed, I’d pair them with some nice leggings, a big cosy jumper and a classic parka jacket.

*The North Face, WOMEN’S THERMOBALL™ LACE-UP BOOTS, £100 | *John Lewis, hush Sadie Parka Coat, Khaki, £175 | *ASOS, adidas Originals Essentials Leggings in Black, £23 | Next, Emma Willis Premium Wool High Neck Jumper, £68

Danielle

I’ve gone for cool and cosy with this outfit. Straight leg leather trousers are a bit edgy and much more interesting than jeans. Best hoodies are from Future self, so so warm and soft, I’d wear this with a khaki jacket so it just looks cream with a pop of blue poking out at the sleeve. Finish it off with a pair of Veja trainers that will last you right through to super cold boot season and they haven’t been out of style for years!

*Mango, Leather-effect elastic waist trousers, £35.99 | *Mango, Satin quilted jacket, £59.99 | *Net-A-Porter, VEJA leather sneakers, £90 | *Future Self, Slogan Hoodie in Blue, £58

Holly

My nephews are roping me into taking them pumpkin picking this year which means I’ll need to have very practical clothing, ready to run after a 4-year-old when he tried to eat snails, so I’ll be going pretty casual. Black jeans and a rusty jumper I think for the ultimate autumnal feel. Indestructible boots and a big ol’ scarf to wrap more pumpkins in when we fill up the wheelbarrow.

Charles & Keith, Lace-Up Ankle Boots – Black, £89 | Accessorize, Wells supersoft blanket scarf grey, £19 | *Monki, Cropped knit sweater, £25 | *Debenhams, Boohoo Plus High Waist Skinny Jeans, £20

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First off, how are you and how is your 2021 going?

We are so excited to welcome our visitors back to Tulleys. The year has been brilliant for us so far kicking off with sunflowers and now with Halloween in full swing with both Shocktober Fest and our pumpkin fields now open.

Can you tell us about Tulleys Farm and its history?

My Great Grandfather Bernard Beare started farming in 1911. My grandparents Denis & Marion Beare took the farm in the direction of traditional PYO business in the early 1970’s it soon became one of the biggest PYO farms in the UK, growing 40 different crops over 120 acres. My Dad Stuart joined the farm in 1991 and converted the farm into more of an entertainment venue, creating immersive seasonal family events with the intention of bringing people together. I have always had involvement in the farm since a young age, I was even once a scare actor. Once I graduated from ag college I joined the farm as hayride manager, I am now operations manager for Pumpkins and sunflowers

How long have you been running ‘Shocktoberfest’ and what’s it all about?

Shocktober fest has been running for 25 years and started with quite a humble beginning with 1 haunted house and a small amount of pumpkins, the event has now grown into Europes largest Halloween event featuring 9 live attractions, street theatre, 2 live music stages, 2 bars, circus show and fairground rides. Every year we attract 450,000 visitors.

What else does Tulleys have to offer year-round?

All year round we have our award-winning escape rooms, where you have 1 hour to escape from a themed room you can choose between ghosts, witches, pirates or even gangsters. We also have seasonal events including our family Christmas event with a real ice rink and PYO sunflowers and pumpkins.

Obviously the last 18 months have been really tough on the events industry, how did you manage over the lockdowns?

During lockdown we created the UK’s first drive-thru farm shop where visitors could order and collect delicious local food without leaving their cars. We also created the drive-in cinema, which proved to be a huge hit. So we kept ourselves and our visitors busy.

What’s next for Tulley’s Farm?

My lips are sealed however we have some very exciting things planned for 2022

A lot of people are about to start purchasing their pumpkins, what’s the benefit of going to a PYO?

If you haven’t visited a PYO pumpkin farm, I would strongly suggest you add this to your bucket list. You really to experience a visit to understand how magical it is.

Can you tell us about your PYO pumpkin nights?

We took inspiration for pumpkin nights from the states, the night consists of pumpkin picking but underneath the moonlight, we also have live actors who interact with visitors, live music and of course delicious food and a cocktail bar.

We were lucky enough to head to Tulley’s for the drive-in cinema last Christmas, what else do you have planned for the festive period?

We are excited to be bringing back our traditional family Christmas event and we know our guests are also excited!

There’s no doubt that as the leaves turn a Harry Styles approved shade of golden and the morning air feels crisper as the days trundle by, the need for an extra layer increases quicker than a box of Celebrations stays full on Xmas morning. 

If you’re not ready to say goodbye to your summer dresses and midi skirts then look no further, because with the right layering pieces on hand, anything is possible (well, almost anything). Add under band tees or strappy dresses and expand your cool weather wardrobe tenfold by coordinating or mismatching thin knits, turtlenecks or long sleeve tees till your hearts content, all whilst staying smugly warm in the process. And for the days when comfort is the ultimate priority (e.g. every day), chuck a new-in or well loved knit over your favourite summer smock and embrace all things bold and baggy- sometimes you need an entirely shapeless ‘fit and we ain’t judging ya for it. 

Including picks from some of our fave brands including Monki, Boden, Sezane and Reformation, consider your autumnal wardrobe levelled up.

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